STANDING Tall in Hamilton has served the community for 20 years, connecting students in need to mentors who support and encourage them.

The one-hour-a-week program runs at 13 local schools, where students engage in resilience building activities one on one with a mentor first, and then altogether.

Two of Standing Tall’s long term volunteers, Doug Palmer and Alan McConachie, passed away last month. To honour the work they committed so much to, and to reflect on Standing Tall’s immense impact, The Spectator spoke to five mentors about the power of the program.

“I have watched my mentee absolutely blossom in front of my eyes,” Bec Doheny said.

Ms Doheny began her mentoring journey almost immediately after the birth of her daughter and loved it so much she took a job at Standing Tall upon her return to work.

“I have a bit of a unique relationship with my mentee – my baby daughter joined me at Standing Tall when she was two days old and she has been to the majority of our sessions through the last two years. So, my mentee has built that relationship with my daughter. She requested that she come, she gets quite disappointed when she is not there. It has been quite wonderful to watch that relationship blossom as well,” she said.

Mark O’Brien works at Iluka Resources, a business that has had a long-standing relationship with Standing Tall. He took some cajoling from colleagues to give being a mentor a shot, but now he reckons he gets more out of it than his mentee does.

“He gives me a sparkle in my eye when I see him. He is a lovely little man,” he said.

Mr O’Brien’s mentee is Liam, 10.

The look of trust in his eyes as Mr O’Brien spoke those kind words about him was something quite special.

“I have got three adult children and they have not long all left home. I felt there was a bit of a void there and a co-worker of mine who had been mentoring for a while kept encouraging me to come along. And then I was introduced to Liam and he’s filled that space in my life that had been a void. Just coming through that experience again of a young lad growing up and what he goes through and the things that are important to him. It’s the group, it’s not just the mentee, on occasions where you can’t turn up, the rest of the group takes up the slack,” he said.

Ian Patience had been involved in an adult mentoring organisation before he moved to Hamilton. He remembers a point early on with his young mentee, Lane, where Mr Patience had to take time away for a health issue. The first time he got back, Lane was frantic, ‘where were you? Where were you?’ That moment of realising how significant he was to Lane has meant a lot to him.

“When we both started, both of us were a bit wary of each other. By the end of the year, he was showing me how to do things – we were making paper planes and he was showing me, at the start of the year he wouldn’t have done that. My kids are all grown up, I don’t see them that often, and it’s nice to have some young people around. I don’t regret any bit of it,” he said.

Frances O’Brien took on a mentee who was in Grade 6 and had the privilege of walking with her through the transition to high school.

“That was a really interesting time of her life and probably quite challenging for her. We had such a good relationship from Grade 6 that I feel she was able to share some of those challenges she was experiencing at school with me and we were able to work through and unpack some of that.

“I know we were both disappointed when I had to step back from mentoring. It was very rewarding for me to see her develop and grow,” she said.

Brad Robinson’s brother-in-law was mentored as a student back in the day, so when Standing Tall came up in conversation around the breakroom table he decided he ought to “give it a shot and get involved in the community where I can”.

His mentee, Carter, is in Grade 6.

“It’s definitely one of the highlights of my week coming in every Wednesday for that hour and it’s always good seeing Carter and the other kids bound in. We have been paired up for this year, it’s been good having a lot of interests in common, whether it is fishing or sport, coming in and comparing the latest catch,” he said.

Why Standing Tall succeeds

Standing Tall differs to a classroom because it’s designed to respond to each child’s needs. If a student is having a difficult day, there is space for the mentor to cater the program to gently help them through their personal challenges. Every student is different too – Carter loves the personal time he gets with Mr Robinson.

“We always gather and then we have our one on one time,” Mr Robinson said.

“Carter and I will go kick the footy or play some basketball, a bit of soccer, there is some group activities, craft and cooking too. There’s no set structure, every week is different.”

And Liam clearly lights up when Mr O’Brien comes into the room every week.

“What I have noticed as the year has progressed, now Liam wants to bring some of his mates in to show them what he does which tells me he is enjoying it,” Mr O’Brien said.

Ms Doheny’s mentee, Elsie from a local school, wrote to say mentorship has “made a really positive difference” for her.

“Being part of the Standing Tall program has helped boost my confidence both at school and out of school. My mentor is really caring, and cool, and we work through things together. It is always good to hear different perspectives. Every Wednesday I am excited to see her,” she said.

Ms Doheny made the point that the shared space mentorship creates is just as powerful as the relationship between mentee and mentor.

“It’s important to note that when the mentors can’t make it for whatever reason, it really does become the collective group and we interact so beautifully and love spending that time with each other,” she said.

Mr Patience agreed.

“The reverse also applies, if they can’t be there for some reason it’s disappointing for us because there’s a gap there in the day that we miss,” he said.

He said childhood mentorship is completely different to the adult mentorship he was once involved in.

“You have to be aware of the child’s needs and you can’t impose things on them, whereas with an adult, they are always asking questions and you are responding to that. With a child you have to find a way to open the door to the interactions. It’s not always easy.”

Ms O’Brien said mentoring “had a big influence on the way I saw myself”.

“It actually helped me. I left one job and didn’t know what I was going to do. I went from working with kindergarten aged kids and now I work with young people at risk. It changed the way I wanted to apply my skills to whatever I wanted to do,” she said.

The Spectator reached out to a former mentee now in his early 20s to hear what the enduring impact has been on his life.

Dylan Breban was mentored for eight years until his final year of high school, and now lives in Canberra with his partner where he works in cybersecurity.

“The mentoring program stood as a pillar of support that significantly shaped my personal growth,” he said.

“This initiative provided me with a valuable mentor, Murray, who became a guiding force throughout the years.

“However, it was not just about an individual connection; the program itself played a crucial role in fostering a culture of mentorship that went beyond formalities. It became a haven for individuals seeking someone to talk to, offering valuable insights, encouragement, and a sense of community.

“Volunteers, ordinary people from the community dedicating their time for free, provided a listening ear and support for those who needed it. Participants found solace in this program, a space where they could navigate the challenges of adolescence and life with the help of empathetic mentors.

“The program aimed at developing not just personal resilience but also nurturing self-belief and confidence in each participant. As a result of this collective effort, individuals emerged from high school equipped with the emotional strength and confidence needed to face future challenges.

“The mentoring program, represented by dedicated volunteers like Murray, became an integral part of our high school experience, leaving an indelible mark on our personal journeys.”

Remembering Doug and Alan

TWO long-term Standing Tall mentors, Doug Palmer and Alan McConachie, both passed away in December.

Upon his retirement from teaching, Mr McConachie joined Standing Tall at Baimbridge College.

In 2014, he was recognised as the Youth Mentor of the Year at the national and state level.

Mr Palmer was very active in Hamilton’s basketball scene and was known and loved for his enthusiastic refereeing.

Ms O’Brien worked alongside him and said he exuded kindness and generosity when working with children.

“He was a great mentor to my son when he was a basketball referee and I found that’s just how Doug was with young kids,” she said.

“He brought them in and he showed great compassion and generosity to all the young people that he encountered; he was wonderful, just wonderful. And the kids used to love it if he was reffing! ‘Oh! Doug’s reffing!’”

Ms Doheny: “He mentored lots of players as well, but that passion went through to his daughter Sara, and Georgie his granddaughter too, they became refs.”

Mr O’Brien said, “his contribution to basketball over the years was amazing,”.

“When you are growing up with kids and you go to the basketball court you might have three or four games a week and you seem to be there all the time – and Doug was there every time.”

Mr Patience said both their reputations still remain strong.

“It’s an inspiring story, particularly the amount of effort they put into the community. It’s not just because they had spare time, it was because they wanted to,” he said.

A celebration of Mr Palmer’s life will be held at the Hamilton Exhibition and Conference Centre in the Hamilton Showgrounds on Thursday, January 18.